Like any good friend, I totally forgot to get a birthday gift to a few of my friends. I totally had my idea for what to do, but was late to do so. I'm finally done, though! For a birthday, it's only right to make a birthday cake to share. There's not better cake than one inspired by one of my favorite bosses from Super Mario RPG, Bundt. Luckily, I get to share this belated gift with not only my friends, but all of you! Check it out, after the jump.
This enormous cake is as large as a house and decorated with colorful icing, delectable pieces of fruit, and a number of bright burning candles. A face composed of succulent frosting appears to have been placed on the cake's top layer.
GOLEM, ANNIVERSARIUM CR 27
N Huge construct (extraplanar)
Init +5; Senses burning candles, darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision; Perception +40
Aura enticement (60 ft., DC 36)
AC 44, touch 19, flat-footed 43 (+10 deflection, +1 Dex, +25 natural, –2 size)
hp 686 (38d10+306); fast healing 15
Fort +24, Ref +25, Will +26
Defensive Abilities baked body, fortification; DR 15/— or 20/slashing; Immune construct traits, fire; SR 38
Weaknesses bite susceptibility
Speed 60 ft., climb 40 ft.
Melee bite +42 (8d10+30 plus grab/19–20), 2 slams +42 (8d8+30 plus grab/19–20)
Ranged burning candles +39 (6d10+6d6 fire)
Space 15 ft.; Reach 20 ft.
Special Attacks swallow whole (8d10 bludgeoning, AC 22, 68 hp), toxic body
Spell-Like Abilities (CL 38th)
At-will—greater teleport (self only), invisibility (self only), plane shift (self only)
Str 31, Dex 13, Con —, Int 16, Wis 14, Cha 25
Base Atk +38; CMB +45 (+47 bull rush, +49 grapple); CMD 65 (67 vs. bull rush, cannot be tripped)
Feats Awesome Blow, Blind Fight, Combat Reflexes, Critical Focus, Great Fortitude, Greater Vital Strike, Improved Bull-Rush, Improved Critical (bite, slam), Improved Initiative, Improved Vital Strike, Iron Will, Lightning Reflexes, Power Attack, Run, Step Up, Vital Strike, Weapon Focus (bite, slam)
Skills Knowledge (geography) +41, Knowledge (local) +41, Knowledge (planes) +41, Perception +40, Stealth +31
Languages Comprehend languages (cannot speak)
SQ toxic body
Baked Body (Ex) The anniversarium golem is composed of a mixture of blessed flour, orderly shortening, unholy eggs, and lawless sugar heated by divine flames. This blasphemous combination gives the anniversarium golem extremely powerful attacks and an unparalleled resistance to destruction. When making attacks, the anniversarium golem adds 3 times its Strength modifier to its damage dice. The golem uses its Charisma score in place of its Constitution score when calculating hit points and any special ability that relies on Constitution. It adds 1-1/2 times its Charisma bonus as a deflection bonus to AC and a resistance bonus to saves. Additionally, its hit dice always grant the maximum number of hit points.
Bite Susceptibility (Ex) The anniversarium golem takes double damage from the bite attacks of other creatures. However, any creature that deals damage to the anniversarium golem with a bite attack is also exposed the golem’s toxic body.
Burning Candles (Su) The anniversarium golem sports enormous, burning candles on its top. The flame on the candles cannot be extinguished by any means save for destroying the golem. These candles emit normal light out to 40 feet and dim light an additional 40 feet beyond. The anniversarium golem can see creatures within this light as per true seeing. Within the dim light, the golem can see creatures as if under the effects of see invisibility.
Additionally, the anniversarium golem can lob an explosive flame as a standard action or four flames as a full-attack action. These flames are ranged touch attacks with a maximum range of 300 feet. Each flames explodes, dealing 6d6 points of damage and 6d6 points of fire damage to the creature struck, while adjacent creatures take half the damage from the explosive splash. A successful DC 36 Reflex save negates the splash damage. The save DC is Constitution-based.
Enticement Aura (Ex) The anniversarium golem’s sweet smells and vibrant appearance attract other creatures, tempting them to eat from the golem’s body. Creatures within 60 feet of the golem must succeed a DC 36 Will save or be compelled to approach the golem and consume a piece of its body as per suggestion. Creatures with the scent special ability receive a –4 penalty to their Will save. Eating from the golem is a standard action and deals 1 point of damage to the golem. Once a creature has eaten from the golem or if the creature succeeded its save, it is immune to the aura for 24 hours. This is a mind-affecting charm effect. The save DC is Charisma-based.
Toxic Body (Ex) Creatures that consume some of the anniversarium golem’s body or are swallowed whole by the golem are exposed to the golem’s corrupt composition. When exposed to the toxic body, a creature must succeed on a DC 36 Fortitude save or become nauseated for 1d4 rounds. Creature who succeed this save are instead sickened for 1d4 rounds. Creatures that were compelled to consume the golem due to the enticement aura receive a –4 penalty to their Fortitude save. The save DC is Constitution-based.
Rumors speak of a mighty golem created at the birth of the universe. This creature, filled with the essence of temporal significance, was eternally doomed to scour existence, searching for noteworthy events. The anniversarium golem, as it came to be known, always makes itself known at paricularly important points in history, such as centennials or notable deaths.
The anniversarium golem travels the multiverse searching for every notable event, in hopes of destroying the cause for the event and prevent future instances of future events. Unfortunately, this has relegated the golem to arriving for every birth, death, wedding, and other simple dates. Even worse, the golem has taken to easing up on its quest. Anyone that can offer a gift of proper value (usually character level x 10gp or character age x 10gp, whichever is higher), satisfies the golem and prevents its return for one year.